Early Life of Adolf Hitler
Non - Fiction
The truth is always in your face
Early Life of Adolf Hitler
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Adolf "Finding Nemo" Hitler / You-Know-Who (April 20,1889 - April 30,1945) was the first man to try out a sexy moustache, which gave him the nickname "Mustadio Aficionado". He was a LVL 60 Blood mage and had a clan called "The Afro Dance Team" that won 7 gold medals in one single WCG. Hitler left his dance group and formed a tribe known as the "Nazi Burger" during 1920 and plotted the plan that would finally wipe out all the whales in Japan. He was known to be a passionate watercolor artist but was never successful in selling any of his art pieces. After knowing that Jews can paint really well, he decided to kill all the Jews he could get his hands onto. And the "Nazi Burger" changed targets from whales to Jews. Even Jewish whales must die.
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Early Life
Hitler was born April 20,1889 at a budget hospital as the fourth son and eighth child of six. When he was a baby he was thrown out of the window of a three-story building and landed on his head, due to some domestic violence, which caused him to be insane / fruit-loop. His father, John "Shark Bait" Hitler was a famous music artist also known as Scatman John. His mother was the 9th mistress of John Hitler therefore Adolf Hitler did not have really high ranking in the family.
Schooling
Hitler was terribly rebellious during schooling, but he had above average grades for his tests especially German. Young Hitler was known as the "weedman" in school because every night he would stay at the school's parking lot and sell his secret stashes of marijuana. No teachers found out, of course, the only teacher that found out had promised not to reveal the secret if Hitler gave her 7kg of marijuana. Did Hitler agree? No, he killed that teacher and buried her in the school garden.
Hitler joined the Art Club during his freshmen year hoping that he would become talented in drawing. However, the teacher paid no attention to him because he was hopeless and she even told him to stab himself with a paintbrush. Hitler then applied for Art lessons outside school but after 9 interviews, he got the exact same answer "Why don't you stab yourself with the paintbrush?"
Hitler failed every single Geography tests because he refuse to accept that there are other countries in the world. Once he threw the test paper out of the window during the examination and stood up, shouting at the teacher "THE WHOLE SHIT STAIN WILL BE CALLED GERMANY". He was sent to detention for the rest of the year.
Hitler failed to attend any PE lessons and he got a whooping F for his results. He always had excuses, either forgetting his gears or having headaches. After near end of the year, he ran out of excuses and finally told the teacher "I do not want to change into my PE gear because people will see my testicle". "You mean testicles?". "No, testicle. I have one". Everyone laughed, and Hitler ran home crying.
Hitler found out that he is actually talented in skateboarding. He took part in the Tony Hawk 1870 WCG and won himself a gold trophy thanks to his signature move, the Grand Laser Beam Twist 360 Holy Spin.
Hitler showing off his moves. The "Grand Laser Beam Twist 360 Holy Spin"
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Adolf Hitler's School Report
German : Adolf has good language skills and creativity. All his essays revolve around ruling the country and having girls taking off their clothes for him, which is quite dark but still creative. He should carry on his life by taking the writing path and publish books, and definitely has the talent to do so. [ A ]
History : Adolf hates history and never fails to sleep in my class. I hate him, but I have to admit that he is quite good in the subject, although I have no idea how he manage to score well for any of my tests if he did not pay attention. [ C - ]
Art : Adolf once told me that he was quite sure he's talented in art. I took a look at his first art homework and almost pissed my pants. His artwork is below average, but he has the right attitude towards this subject and should continue trying his best. Who knows one day he might become a famous artist. [ E ]
Chemistry : Adolf is the dumbest student I had ever seen in my 40 years of life in the school. He cannot perform a simple filtration, he should just stab himself with a paintbrush. [ F ]
Biology : Adolf is the most helpful student in class. He offered to feed the lab rats and even clean the lab. He must put in more effort in his work though, if not I will have to stab him with a paintbrush. Just joking, he has hope. [ D ]
PE : Adolf failed to attend all of my lessons. After 150 excuses, he finally admitted that he has only 1 testicle. I should have known, that moustache freak cannot possibly have 2 balls. He should build up his courage and attend my lessons, there is nothing wrong or embarrassing to have 1 testicle. LOL, nvm but seriously, he should be more serious in PE. It concerns his health. [ F ]
Physics : Adolf is a very strange child. He paid no attention in class and keeps telling me over and over again how much he wanted Jews to perish. [ F ]
Music : Adolf is quite a talented drummer, he could even join a band next time. But his attitude is horrible, he almost killed his Jewish classmate with his drumsticks and called me a "Pussboy". [ B ]
Form Class : Adolf is very aggressive and always told me how much he hated Jews. He once beat up his Jewish classmate and told him to suck his balls. The taunt didn't really work out well because his other classmates started telling him that he only has one. Adolf must work hard in building his character, if not there will be chaos in the future.
Hitler usually stays in the bathroom after school to cry about his testicle.
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ISSUE 4
The truth is always in your face
Early Life of Adolf Hitler
__________________________________________________________________________________
Adolf "Finding Nemo" Hitler / You-Know-Who (April 20,1889 - April 30,1945) was the first man to try out a sexy moustache, which gave him the nickname "Mustadio Aficionado". He was a LVL 60 Blood mage and had a clan called "The Afro Dance Team" that won 7 gold medals in one single WCG. Hitler left his dance group and formed a tribe known as the "Nazi Burger" during 1920 and plotted the plan that would finally wipe out all the whales in Japan. He was known to be a passionate watercolor artist but was never successful in selling any of his art pieces. After knowing that Jews can paint really well, he decided to kill all the Jews he could get his hands onto. And the "Nazi Burger" changed targets from whales to Jews. Even Jewish whales must die.
__________________________________________________________________________________
Early Life
Hitler was born April 20,1889 at a budget hospital as the fourth son and eighth child of six. When he was a baby he was thrown out of the window of a three-story building and landed on his head, due to some domestic violence, which caused him to be insane / fruit-loop. His father, John "Shark Bait" Hitler was a famous music artist also known as Scatman John. His mother was the 9th mistress of John Hitler therefore Adolf Hitler did not have really high ranking in the family.
Schooling
Hitler was terribly rebellious during schooling, but he had above average grades for his tests especially German. Young Hitler was known as the "weedman" in school because every night he would stay at the school's parking lot and sell his secret stashes of marijuana. No teachers found out, of course, the only teacher that found out had promised not to reveal the secret if Hitler gave her 7kg of marijuana. Did Hitler agree? No, he killed that teacher and buried her in the school garden.
Hitler joined the Art Club during his freshmen year hoping that he would become talented in drawing. However, the teacher paid no attention to him because he was hopeless and she even told him to stab himself with a paintbrush. Hitler then applied for Art lessons outside school but after 9 interviews, he got the exact same answer "Why don't you stab yourself with the paintbrush?"
Hitler failed every single Geography tests because he refuse to accept that there are other countries in the world. Once he threw the test paper out of the window during the examination and stood up, shouting at the teacher "THE WHOLE SHIT STAIN WILL BE CALLED GERMANY". He was sent to detention for the rest of the year.
Hitler failed to attend any PE lessons and he got a whooping F for his results. He always had excuses, either forgetting his gears or having headaches. After near end of the year, he ran out of excuses and finally told the teacher "I do not want to change into my PE gear because people will see my testicle". "You mean testicles?". "No, testicle. I have one". Everyone laughed, and Hitler ran home crying.
Hitler found out that he is actually talented in skateboarding. He took part in the Tony Hawk 1870 WCG and won himself a gold trophy thanks to his signature move, the Grand Laser Beam Twist 360 Holy Spin.
Hitler showing off his moves. The "Grand Laser Beam Twist 360 Holy Spin"__________________________________________________________________________________
Adolf Hitler's School Report
German : Adolf has good language skills and creativity. All his essays revolve around ruling the country and having girls taking off their clothes for him, which is quite dark but still creative. He should carry on his life by taking the writing path and publish books, and definitely has the talent to do so. [ A ]
History : Adolf hates history and never fails to sleep in my class. I hate him, but I have to admit that he is quite good in the subject, although I have no idea how he manage to score well for any of my tests if he did not pay attention. [ C - ]
Art : Adolf once told me that he was quite sure he's talented in art. I took a look at his first art homework and almost pissed my pants. His artwork is below average, but he has the right attitude towards this subject and should continue trying his best. Who knows one day he might become a famous artist. [ E ]
Chemistry : Adolf is the dumbest student I had ever seen in my 40 years of life in the school. He cannot perform a simple filtration, he should just stab himself with a paintbrush. [ F ]
Biology : Adolf is the most helpful student in class. He offered to feed the lab rats and even clean the lab. He must put in more effort in his work though, if not I will have to stab him with a paintbrush. Just joking, he has hope. [ D ]
PE : Adolf failed to attend all of my lessons. After 150 excuses, he finally admitted that he has only 1 testicle. I should have known, that moustache freak cannot possibly have 2 balls. He should build up his courage and attend my lessons, there is nothing wrong or embarrassing to have 1 testicle. LOL, nvm but seriously, he should be more serious in PE. It concerns his health. [ F ]
Physics : Adolf is a very strange child. He paid no attention in class and keeps telling me over and over again how much he wanted Jews to perish. [ F ]
Music : Adolf is quite a talented drummer, he could even join a band next time. But his attitude is horrible, he almost killed his Jewish classmate with his drumsticks and called me a "Pussboy". [ B ]
Form Class : Adolf is very aggressive and always told me how much he hated Jews. He once beat up his Jewish classmate and told him to suck his balls. The taunt didn't really work out well because his other classmates started telling him that he only has one. Adolf must work hard in building his character, if not there will be chaos in the future.
Hitler usually stays in the bathroom after school to cry about his testicle.__________________________________________________________________________________
ISSUE 4